Ask the Experts!!

An Adoptive Parent Writes:

My husband and I will be adopting from Haiti. We plan to incorporate his/her Haitian, French and African culture into her life and educate him on all aspects of his heritage. Because we are white, my family live in another country (they are mixed racially) and my husband's family are white, how do we become involved with the Black community? I have neighbors that are African American, and we say the usual neighborly "Hi," but nothing else. Any advice, guidance, recommendations will be greatly appreciated.

 

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John Raible Answers:

I just returned from Haiti, where my sister and I picked up her beautiful, newly-adopted daughter. There are many things you can do now to begin your own cultural journey, which will aid you in facilitating your child's journey later. Most international adoption agencies have web sites which include information about each country. They can also put you in contact with other parents who have already made the journey. When you make calls to Haiti in preparation for your trip, spend extra time talking to native people and asking questions only they can answer.

I do not know where you will be staying, but we were fortunate to be at the Foundation House, where 2-3 workers were on site during the day. They spent time with us, talking of politics, culture and giving more information about the first months of my niece's life. This information has already been invaluable, and we made two very good friends we will continue to correspond with in the future. We intend to meet again when my niece is old enough to return for her first visit. I kept a journal during our travels, and we took many rolls of film, thereby valuing this experience for all of us, and creating many opportunities for discussion as she grows.

 I would suggest making a concerted effort to befriend your neighbors. During the next opportunity for conversation, share with them your plans to adopt and your desire to make connections. Their response will indicate whether they will be potential allies or a possible barrier to your child growing up in the neighborhood. Research has shown that while most African Americans have concerns about issues in transracial adoptions, the majority support the practice if they see parents attempting to support their children's culture.

For you, it is critical to understand that Haitians are not African American, and in the first and second generations, they have less contact with American-born Blacks. Therefore you must learn both Haitian and U.S. African American cultural traditions to enable your child to feel connected to both birth and adopted cultures.

As there are fewer Haitians, it will be more difficult to gain access into their lives. In addition to attending February Black History Month events, Juneteenth and Kwanzaa activities, you should also seek out Caribbean events. While not the same, Dominicans, Jamaicans and people from the Bahamas share many cultural traditions similar to Haiti which will help bridge the gap. If there is a nearby college, there may be a Haitian Student Association, and certainly a Black student organization which may have Haitian members. They may be able to put you in touch with people in your community who may be closer than you think.

While in Haiti, ask people at the orphanage or your agency if they have contacts with people in your local area. The bottom line is the more effort you make to learn about and meet people from your child's birth culture, the more success you will have in the long run. Best of luck!

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