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An Adoptive Parent Writes:My husband and I are white and Jewish. We have two biological children. Our new adopted 2-year old daughter is half Mexican, half Black and intersex (was born with both male and female genitalia- surgically "corrected" to be a girl). She will very possibly have to deal with issues of homosexuality/gender identity disturbance. Any suggestions?
John Raible Answers:
My initial thought on this topic is that there are striking parallels between the way transracial adoption has been practiced and how intersex babies are often treated. Well-intentioned adults attempt to play God with the lives of powerless infants, making decisions that will incur lifelong consequences for the child (and the adult the child will quickly become).
Parents of children in both situations need to think carefully and repeatedly over time about their powerful decisions. They should prepare to conscientiously revise the story they tell their child as the child grows and becomes better able to understand the parents' actions. Start now while the child is young, to educate yourselves on the issues of race, biracial identity, gender, gender fluidity, transgender issues, and adoption. You have your work cut out for you. Good luck!
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04/13/2007