Preparing Children to Talk
about Their Adoption
Presented by: Maris Blechner, Family Focus, Inc.
The NYS Citizens' Coalition for Children, Inc.
13th Annual Statewide Adoption Training Conference
Adoption 2002: Linking Promises to Possibilities
May 11, 2002 • Albany New York  

 

The Truth and Nothing But The Truth
By: Jane Schooler

  • Be willing to initiate conversation
  • Never lie
  • Omissions are okay until age 12, after that all information should be shared
  • If information is negative, use third party to relate details
  • Parents should be present for the telling
  • Don't impose value judgments on the information
  • Allow child to express anger toward birth family without joining in
  • Remember child probably knows more than you think he does
  • Child needs to have control over sharing  
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5/20/02